Burnout...and Learning More About My Sacral Energy
Over the last few weeks, I slowly slid into burnout territory again, engaging in things that made sense in theory, but in practice were not energizing or exciting for me. Did I have some sense of this when I was doing it? Yes, I probably did. However, old habits die hard and there I was, grinding away, as the flames savagely licked at my back, quietly whispering to myself, “THIS IS FINE.”
While my first inclination is always shame (because, human), I am grateful that I had this experience of massive frustration to show me what it’s like to do a total reset. If you have a 3 in your Human Design Profile (I’m a 1/3) or a 6 (and you’re under 30) I also want to tell you - I SEE YOU. This life of always needing to touch the hot stove even after they tell you it’s hot…it’s not for the faint of heart.
I’m also glad I had my first taste of burnout that wasn’t at my corporate job. It proves that burnout can happen even if you’re working on something that you find deeply exciting and interesting…the key for Generators and MG’s (or anyone, really!) is that it doesn’t really matter how much you love the overarching theme of what you’re doing…if the energy is not being used properly, it’s just not sustainable.
So, here are my key takeaways from this experience:
I SHOULD CHECK IN WITH MYSELF AS OFTEN AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE
As we’ve discussed before, the Sacral only operates in the now. It doesn’t care if I’ve entered into something without getting all the details and exploring how I would be using my energy. It can’t just magically summon the energy without getting drained.
Sometimes it can be easy to enter into things without really getting clear on what the actual work will entail. In my case, I was working with information that I found exciting, but I wasn’t enjoying the actual process of writing about it. Had I taken the time to check in with myself and respond to each part of the actual process I was going to need to go through before entering into it, I probably could have saved myself a lot of frustration.
For MG’s, it’s normal and healthy for you to try something out before making a pivot. For Generators, it can be a lot harder to re-route that energy once you get going (the stubbornness of that stream once I get it going is always astonishing to me…finishing can feel like a compulsion). So, check in with yourself at the BEGINNING before you fully commit to the long haul.
If you have Emotional Authority, you’re used to taking the time to “play hard to get” and ride your emotional wave before you make a decision. However, even if you have Sacral Authority and can decide more quickly in the moment, I would say that the important thing to do is get all the details and respond to each part of the process before you take it on.
I NEED TO HEED THE SIGNS AND RESPOND TO THEM PROPERLY
One day recently, a chunk of what I had been working on was mysteriously deleted. That day, I decided to take a break, which was good. I went on a walk, I got back in the flow, I took a few days from working on the project. However, once I got back to work, instead of pausing and waiting to respond to the next part of the project, I was all NEVERTHELESS SHE PERSISTED (i.e. basically asking for burnout) and went back to finish that thing. In that case, I sort of got lucky. I did want to finish that section and I felt energized by it.
However, I think at the time I was also susceptible to pushing through to finish anything. As a Generator, pushing through is not a good color on me. If you’re an MG, you may find you have a bit more stamina for this and you will continue making progress without draining yourself, as long as you’ve responded correctly. But for everyone - those signs are golden opportunities to pause and respond again. Moving forward I will be paying much more attention to the signs, inspiration, and interruptions I’m magnetizing and use them as a chance to regroup.
AS I DECONDITION, MY THRESHOLD FOR ENGAGING IN DRAINING ACTIVITIES IS DECREASING
I’m noticing that as I’ve deconditioned from the unhealthy way I used to work at my job, I’m much more sensitive to using my energy the wrong way. Previously, I could work long hours doing things I wasn’t energized by for months before going into massive burnout…sometimes 3-6 months! Now, just a couple weeks (and sometimes a couple of days) is enough to burn me out. I am welcoming this because it means I can regroup and make a change without wasting as much time or harming myself as much.
MY AWARENESS TENDS TO BE A LITTLE AHEAD OF MY ENERGY
As a Generator, I have a harder time pivoting my energy once it’s out of the gate. Do I consciously want to experience burnout? No, I really don’t. It’s a terrible feeling that I find deeply uncomfortable. However, once I become aware I’ve responded incorrectly to something and need to make a pivot, I often notice that my awareness of the need to make that pivot comes ahead of my energy’s actual ability to do that.
It’s almost like I’m standing next to a raging river and I am deciding that, well, this river now needs to go a little to the left. It takes a while to build the dam or dig out the new path for the river because it’s just such a consistent stream of energy that can’t be moved very quickly.
In that case, I’ve learned that it’s important to just be patient and let these shifts happen inside of me, as I observe them lovingly and stay very clear on the shift I want to make. My energy does eventually catch up to my awareness.
I am truly curious: does this happen to the rest of you? Leave me a comment :)
WHEN I’VE ENTERED BURNOUT TERRITORY, I HAVE TO GIVE MYSELF A BREAK
For me, if I am already in burnout territory, action has to be suspended for the time being. When I’m burnt out, I can’t hear my Sacral Authority and I’m incredibly cloudy. There is no sense to be made of anything when I’m burnt out, and it’s not a good time for me to try to take the next step.
For Generators, this probably happens when you’re working on something that isn’t how you’d like to be using your energy, but for MGs this could also happen if you are spending too much time on one thing or overextending yourself by saying yes to things that are not energizing for you.
When this happens, I step away from what I’m doing. I take the time to connect with myself and clarify how I want to spend my energy. For me, this involves a lot of journaling, pulling oracle cards, getting into my Human Design Environment (mine is the Kitchen), and doing purely fun things, like making art and playing video games.
When I worked at a job, and I would get to a place of burnout, I would ask for help, support, a break from some of my responsibilities, take a vacation if possible, or ask for a shift toward something that I felt more excited about. In my free time, I would get extra rest and do as many playful, fun things as possible.
I DON’T NEED TO BE AFRAID TO PAUSE AND WAIT TO RESPOND
I sometimes get so irritated and resistant about taking a break and waiting for the next response because there’s always that fear of not knowing what to do next, believing that nothing will appear to respond to, not understanding how everything will fit together, or not knowing what will happen to me.
What I always try to remember is that, as a Sacral being, my aura is magnetic by nature. If I’m clogging my energy field with a bunch of things that are causing me frustration, I will be stuck in my bubble. When I release those things, I open the space for amazing new things to come to me. As Generators and MG’s, we draw things in. We just do…it’s how our aura works. The sooner you stop engaging in that thing that is no longer energizing you, the faster opportunities will come at you, wanting your powerful, warm, capable, uplifting Generator/MG energy.
Let me know - what is your experience making changes? How does it work for you?
Love,
Rachel
Make sure to keep in touch!